Let me start by saying, from the outside I am sure it looks like I have had an easy life. In some ways that is true. I have never worried about a roof over my head, food to eat or anything else I have ever needed. If I needed something it was there. However, I would say that appearances can be deceiving. From the outside, it looked like I had a perfect life. On the inside, I was filled with anger, frustration and a deep knowing that things had to change for me. For many people, as long as appearances are maintained then no problem exists. This created a lot of struggle for me because I just wanted to fix the cause, so I could actually be happy. Instead of ignoring the cause and pasting on a happy face.
I am grateful for all the lessons I learned from my experiences. It took me forty years to understand that I could learn and grow without hardship, struggle, and pain. I now see the role I played in creating my life. As well as the obligations I made with my family in order to feed the growth that I wanted for myself. Now that I understand my power, I am using it to bring in the good instead of hardship. Do you know how much easier life can be when you stop punishing yourself? Realizing my own self-worth and that I could love myself just as I am has done amazing things to change my life.
Looking back now, a key piece for me was that I knew very early in life that I wanted to be a healer. I think I came in knowing that and I believed that in order to become a good healer I needed to be surrounded by illness. So, that is what happened. As a healer, you also need to be a good problem solver. I learned early on how to see a problem three steps ahead and how to diffuse it as much as possible resulting in less to clean up. Work smart, not hard. Unfortunately, I was genetically programmed to be a hard worker. Until recently, I only knew hard work. Work hard enough to cover for at least three people and maybe it would somehow prove my worth. I could see clearly what others needed to work on and yet could never solve the underlining issues for myself. I had I high need to help others, I tended to pick up the slack for others thinking that I was helping. What I finally learned is that everyone has their own lessons and taking on someone else’s pain doesn’t really help them. In the end, they still need to learn their own lesson. It is their lesson. Not mine.
It feels like I have been at a crossroad so many times in my life. I somehow hit a wall, get stuck in the muck of it for a bit until I figure out the best way for me to move forward (or sideways). Sometimes any movement at all felt like a relief. To be honest, I called in a lot of challenge in my life. Life had to be difficult. I had to struggle to get anywhere and often didn’t end up where I wanted. I had a pattern. Spend two or three years in an environment. Take on the problems of others, try to fix everything for everyone at a high cost to myself until I eventually burned out and just had to leave the situation completely only to start it again somewhere else. I saw the pattern, I just couldn’t figure out how to change it at the time.
When I was 29, I was at a major crossroad. I was clinically depressed and in a dead-end job that I hated. Initially, I took a couple weeks off to try to fix myself. I spent a couple days in bed trying to ignore the issue and then got a call to go help because my grandfather was sick. Of course, that was a call to action that I could deal with. My grandfather was a quiet and strong man who was always there for his family. He gave to anyone in need without exception and without any expectations. This felt like an opportunity to give back to him and let him know that his unconditional love was received and returned in kind. I felt this was also an opportunity to possibly fix myself by helping him. I spent six months with him and watched him fade from the man I knew to someone else entirely. I learned a lot about myself and my family through that process. I became even more introspective and also tried to understand the motivations of the people around me. His death also allowed me to move forward in a new direction with a fresh start.
The healer inside of me needed to be expressed and I knew I had to explore more alternatives in healing. The conventional medical system has never been something I gravitated towards. My mother has been sick for most of my life and I had watched her struggle with medications and surgeries with limited hope of recovery. My objective was to find a system of medicine that made sense to me while providing real results.
I stumbled on Homeopathy. It was established a few hundred years ago and, in its essence, has remained unchanged. The core lessons are around “Like cures Like”; meaning if a substance can create certain symptoms in a healthy person they will cure similar symptoms in a sick person. The homeopathic remedies are also highly potentized samples of natural resources such as animal, mineral and plant tinctures. I also liked that it treats people as individuals, looking at their specific symptoms rather than a collective of commonalities. Homeopathy really resonated with me. I went on to study at the Canadian College of Homeopathy and received my honours diploma in Homeopathy. I graduated knowing that I was capable of being the healer I always dreamed of and with the knowledge that I could help people who really needed it.
What I didn’t know was that I still had a lot of challenge, hardship and struggle ingrained in my subconscious. After graduation, I spent five years trying to educate people and build a business that could support my dreams. By the end, I felt like such a failure I could barely look at myself let alone call myself a healer. I took a break for a while, hiding in another dead-end job taking on everyone else’s issues and ignoring my own.
Finally, I started exploring again. I kept going back to the idea that the subconscious mind played a huge role in our everyday lives. If you could access it, you could change how it affects our decisions and how we live our lives. I went on to explore numerous different modalities surrounding the subconscious mind, however, they all seemed to provide limited results and required active ongoing effort. I knew something else had to be out there that could create lasting change with limited effort.
I found ThetaHealing through an email. I somehow got on a mailing list to send me podcasts introducing different practitioners and their modalities, and I listened to a few over the course of a year. I bought a few packages and even took a few courses. ThetaHealing was introduced to me via one of these podcasts. I went on to buy the package of mp3’s and e-books. The mp3’s provided with some clearing and more interest however they seemed very surface. I found that I needed to dig into my issues on a deeper level. I went online and looked for a Theta Healer in my area and found Kathrine Williams.
I was completely blown away at how quickly and seemingly effortless she zeroed in on my programs. Work issues that had kept me in never-ending loop my entire life, she figured out in minutes. Kathrine then went on to look at my beliefs around being a healer and found amazing blocks that finally made me understand why I had been unsuccessful in building my business. That night I got off the phone feeling euphoric. I decided to look at the job postings and apply for a position I had already applied for a few times over the last few years. Within 7 days, I had multiple interviews and received the job. I started my new job officially on January 4th and started ThetaHealing classes with Kathrine on January 6th. Since then I have been on a journey of self-discovery and self-empowerment.
The next step in my transformation was when I travelled to Greece to certify as a ThetaHealing Instructor with Vianna Stibal. I stepped out on my own and followed my own desires to create my new life. I also returned to an amazing opportunity with Kathrine to create the Radically Awakened Masters Wellness Centre. These were all major steps in understanding the power of manifesting your desires and being open to the opportunities when they are presented.
I have created a new business as an Intuitive Life Coach and ThetaHealing Instructor. I coach people through individual sessions and my specialized program that helps you define an aspect of your life that is causing the most hardship. We explore all the different ways that you are holding it in place through your beliefs and help you to release the hardship and create the life of your dreams. If you are ready to empower yourself, I also teach ThetaHealing classes. This is an opportunity for you to discover your programs and obtain the tools to change them.
Are you ready to Create Change for You?